


Death Before Dishonor

by levisackerman (bokuakathots)



Category: Attack - Fandom, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, Pre-Shingeki no Kyojin: Kuinaki Sentaku | Attack on Titan: No Regrets, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan Manga Spoilers, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan References, Shingeki no Kyojin: Before the fall | Attack on Titan: Before the Fall, Shingeki no Kyojin: Kuinaki Sentaku | Attack on Titan: No Regrets
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-21
Updated: 2021-01-21
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:28:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28623315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bokuakathots/pseuds/levisackerman
Summary: in which Rena Mizuhara wants to die in honor for the Survey Corps but fate has other plans for her, including her saving Levi Ackerman from the depths of hell and death.
Relationships: Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)/Original Character(s), Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)/Original Female Character(s)





	1. THE UNDERGROUND

**Author's Note:**

> so you might have already saw this before, i had to unpublish the first attempt because i made a wrong move in where to start and i couldn't picture myself the way i wrote it so here we are with the better one ( although it is not really the better one to say the least )

* * *

**_RENA MIZUHARA WANTS TO TOUCH THE SKY._ **

The young Mizuhara is very focused on wanting to touch the sky in her hand wanting to grasp it as she feels the movement of the air in her skin, she wants to feel the shivers and goosebumps while reaching out for the sky— Rena Mizuhara wants to see daylight just for once. Her eyes beam with sparks as she noticed the falling feather from above, slowly descending from the outside world as if there is wind here in the underground and Rena decides to catch it in her hands before it disappears.

Her feet immediately dashed to the falling feather in such speed as if it was already set for her to move up ahead and in swift, jumping to the boxes, puddles so swiftly and in grace as if she had been training for this.

Rena Mizuhara is a girl with mysteries that even herself doesn't even know about it or perhaps she was told not to know everything in the first place, not wanting to see the young Mizuhara girl from ever falling into the traps of hell. It took seconds for her to catch the feather in her hand without getting injured or bruises in her body, her lips form a victorious smile as the feather is in the palm of her hand getting goosebumps as the tip of her fingers touch it with such delicacy.

"Oi you're blocking my way, brat."

Rena Mizuhara turns around to notice a man standing few meters away from her with a knife in his hand covered in a cloth with few blood stains on it, she knew that face— that look that everyone feared in the underground and meeting him means either you give way or be gone. "You could have said 'excuse me' in the first place but fine," Rena Mizuhara growls as she gives way for him to walk by, keeping the feather in her hands not wanting to lost it in her sight "Tsk, whatever," he said sternly as he walks pass by her, his eyes glancing at hers for a second before continuing to walk with his companion.

It is rare of him to leave people on their own and she is one of the those rare people _Levi Ackerman_ couldn't care less about it, Rena Mizuhara calls herself for it but to some it is a mystery to have him letting her walk freely without having trouble with him.

She comes home still holding the feather in her hands keeping it in her care, hearing her aunt sweeping the floor with a broom and when she hears the door closed she immediately knew Rena Mizuhara comes late for their dinner, _again_. "Where do you think you're going?" her aunt asked as she spots Rena quietly walking at the stairs, having the defeat look on her face as she looks at her aunt "I went out with friends that's all," Rena Mizuhara answered giving the woman a plastered smile, earning a groan.

"Don't tell me you tried to walk outside—"

"I didn't but I got a feather from the sky."

"You mean outside of the underground Rena, there is no such thing as sky in the underground."

"Aren't people looking up in the sky?"

"There is no such thing as sky in the underground young lady, it is something those elite people can have."

It did hurt Rena Mizuhara a lot, like a _lot_ lot for her as if it wants to crush her moments right away but the woman was right in the end— there is no such thing as sky in the underground. There was no daylight but rather darkness hovering them for years, there was nothing but darkness welcoming them in open arms, the people in the underground were like prisoners that are not allowed to seek sunlight or even taste the elegant life outside the underground. "I saw _Levi_ again and he's angry as always," Rena mumbled under her breathe.

"Don't tell me you got in trouble young girl," her aunt said, shaking her head lightly towards her niece "We're cool! He doesn't bother me at all," Rena assures her aunt, giving her thumbs up. It is true to say the least that Rena Mizuhara isn't bothered by him at all despite the numerous times that they meet at the streets, she doesn't give a care about what he is doing for he is doing the same thing to her as well— both are not bothered by what they do so it is a win-win for them anyway.

There it is again, another encounter with _Levi_ and there was that awkward tension between them. Rena Mizuhara helps her aunt in delivering the mats that she sews to get money in order to supply themselves food, water and clothing. She wouldn't call it her worst day but every time they meet there is already tension in their eyes as if they're rivals or enemies at some point.

She hands over the mats to him while avoiding his gaze wanting to break the tension between them, usually it is his companion who hands over the money with a joke from his companion that _Levi_ hates touching people's hand especially if it is dirty but today's different. "I'll come over next time, you can leave," he said sternly still having that look on his face as he hands her over the money— way bigger than she expected.

"Hey this is too much! You can keep the rest."

"Are you saying something?"

"Nevermind _brat_ , I'm heading home now."

"Whatever, go home already _Rena_."

She froze in her place as she turns around and was about to walk away from his home, her mind tries not to overthink things but then she asked herself this— how does he even know her name? Maybe it is because her aunt mentioned her to him but he barely talks to her aunt, most of the time Rena talks to him. Maybe Rena mentioned her name to him and probably slipped out of her mind, she recalls the time she told him her name but all she got was nothing.

Perhaps it's the vendors who knew her at some point and he probably heard it from other people, that can be possible to say the least. "I—I know, thanks for that," she spoke before walking away at his home, his eyes still watching her as she walks at the distance.

* * *

_**RENA MIZUHARA LOOKS UP TO SEE SOMETHING NEW.** _

It became a habit of her to look up above as if she is expecting to come down from above or perhaps she is and that nobody doesn't pay attention to it, Rena gazed down at the feather in her hand having the dismay look on her face as she glanced shortly at her ring finger that was chopped long ago, reminding her of the family secret that she is holding onto. A reminder that she only remembered today and thanks to her aunt who had reminded her of how she had to take her away from violence at such a young age. _Rena Mizuhara is the last descendant of our clan_ , she never understood what it meant for Rena isn't allowed to ask such things as that.

Perhaps Rena Mizuhara is not meant to know things such as that.

"Oi go home already," she turns to see Levi with his arms crossed over his chest, his eyebrow raised in a concerned manner. His stoic expression remains to be as it is which bothers Rena at some point asking herself if this guy ever smiled or was happy once— the Underground won't be a happy place and it will never be, this place doesn't have any remorse or a memory to have anyone happy and if so, it's not like it happens all the time. Rena Mizuhara knew Levi Ackerman from childhood but she barely got the hundred percent information about him, it's barely unbelievable how they met in the first place.

"You sounded like my aunt," she said almost in a mumble, annoyed a bit at the attitude.

"You're still in that silly dream," Levi said before sighing deeply.

"What? As if you don't have one," says Rena in annoyance.

"I really don't have one," Levi said sternly, earning a shriek from Rena Mizuhara.

She looks at him in annoyance having questions in her head whether this man ever learn to take a break or what, Levi Ackerman looks back to her still with the stoic look on his face as if he's expecting something from her. "Okay fine— this will be the first and last time I'd give in," Rena Mizuhara said, her lips pouting as she joins him and walk together at the side of the street with Levi telling her every minute to keep down her tone while she talks along the way.

There was a big tension and awkward vibes between them as if they're not meant to be together or something— perhaps they are not meant to and Rena Mizuhara agrees to that way, besides she doesn't have time to think of loving someone or be in a relationship. Not that she wants to be by herself for the rest of her life, Rena couldn't see her having a relationship at this moment. Getting out of the underground and helping her aunt is the number one priority for now.

"You're going outside aren't you?" Levi suddenly asks, not out loud that everyone can hear.

"I'll be going outside one day and you can't stop me," Rena proudly said, her eyes glaring at Levi's stoic face.

"I never said anything, do what you do," Levi said sternly earning a look from Rena.

Levi watches her— more like staring at her to say the least, there was something in Rena Mizuhara that draws him closer, wanting to get to her closer and wanting to get more closer. Being with Rena Mizuhara is equivalent to trouble and danger and it has been like that even when they first met as kids, Levi is beginning to get tired saving her. "Do you know what's like to be outside?" Rena Mizuhara asks out of the blue "That's a stupid question," Levi answered bluntly, earning a deep sigh from the young Mizuhara.

"I expected that answer from you."

"I've never been outside so stop asking."

"Was it because you're an—"

"Don't even think about it."

"Okay, just as I thought."

Silence welcomes the two after that conversation neither one of them wants to finish or continue to said conversation, Rena Mizuhara almost snapped Levi Ackerman just like that and without having a slight clue about it— that she had almost spilled that one secret that he had told her few years ago and begs of her not to tell anyone. By the time they had reached the house of the Mizuhara, he noticed the sudden stiff of Rena Mizuhara at the sight of her home being ransacked with traces of blood outside.

Rena Mizuhara felt the strong sense of adrenaline rushing through her veins as if it tells her to make a move or else everything will be in crumbles, the strong sense of that adrenaline became a trigger point for her that she didn't even realize it's starting to control her mind and body. "Oi we have—" Levi Ackerman stood still as he watches Rena Mizuhara rushes inside her home within a blink of an eye— hell, he didn't even notice that she had made her way to the house until he saw the door slammed shut.

_What's with that sudden move?_ Levi asks himself as he follows her behind, opening the door and there was Rena Mizuhara standing at the small living room holding a knife on her hand, controlling her temper but it seems that it is not even working because as soon as Levi Ackerman calls her name the young Mizuhara swiftly runs from the house— hell, he didn't even realize she had been on the move again just like earlier. Levi Ackerman was all by himself now, with a deep sigh he goes out to search for Rena MIzuhara.

Levi Ackerman swears there is something in Rena Mizuhara that pulls him closer and he is so close to get it.

* * *

_**IT WAS A MESS— EVERYTHING IS IN A MESS.** _

Rena Mizuhara's grip on the bloody knife is so tight that her knuckles are getting pale, his eyes became dark as they look at the pile of bodies she stabbed with a knife she's holding. The scene is in a horrible place— blood everywhere, piles of bodies are on the floor, her hands and clothes are stained with blood. Her eyes gazed at the dead bodies on the floor having no remorse of guilt that she murdered them within a flash. It was the same thing as how they murdered her aunt and stole everything from them.

Rena Mizuhara committed a crime. The first crime that was caused by a crime also.

There was no pain nor guilt from the crime she committed— or perhaps there isn't at all, Rena Mizuhara simply drops the knife and fell on the ground. Her eyes didn't leave the gaze on the dead bodies of those responsible for her aunt's death. She knew thos faces before and yet she was being ignorant for not being alert and keeping her eyes more open. Perhaps Rena should have stayed at home instead of going outside and dream of going outside in the hopes that maybe she can get rid of the stigma in the Underground. Perhaps Rena should have—

" _Mizuhara_..."

She didn't move an inch, her body remains as to where she is— too frightened to move a single part of her body. Rena Mizuhara doesn't want that kind of adrenaline to control her anymore, it is killing her slowly. " _Mizuhara_..." it said again but this time she felt a strong grip on her upper arms, shaking her whole body. Rena looks at Levi Ackerman and even though he still had the stoic look on his face she is still shaken up by what happen. "Farlan help us get out of here," he heard Levi spoke more likely it was a command, Rena Mizuhara stands up from the ground and lets Levi get her out of the mess.

"Levi..." Rena spoke softly, almost like a whisper.

"Don't, _Mizuhara_. Just don't," Levi shuts her off.

"Levi..." Rena spoke again but this time, he couldn't hear it almost.

"Don't _Mizuhara_. Just don't," Levi repeated what he had just said seconds ago.

Rena wanted to ask him why he is calling him by her surname and not the first name anymore, was he too tired of the first name basis? Should she go back to the last name basis? She's too tired to think about it, Rena Mizuhara didn't go anywhere beside Levi Ackerman. What happened back there is something she couldn't explain, why her body reacted that way. She never felt that kind of anger before— wanting to have revenge and all that just to satisfy pleasure and needs to see someone suffer. Rena Mizuhara had never felt that kind of rage— the kind of rage that made her murder people like how she did and yet, she had it all within a snap of a finger.

_Rena Mizuhara is the last descendant of our clan_.

That line came back to her as if it is welcoming her to the gates of hell, giving her remarks after she murdered those people who did it to her aunt. _Last descendant?_ Perhaps whoever said that long ago was right, Rena Mizuhara is all by herself now with nowhere to go and nowhere to hide. She is pretty sure everyone will go after her now—

"Oi Rena— don't you even try to kill me because I can kill you first," Levi Ackerman snaps her thoughts.

"I—I didn't... I—" Rena Mizuhara stutters, not finding the right words to say.

"You didn't murder anyone but you did? Sounds familiar to me," Levi said, gently pushing her inside of his house with Farlan shutting the door behind them.

"I'm sorry—" Rena was then interrupted by Levi.

"Don't _Mizuhara_. Just don't," Levi said for the third time.

This time, Rena Mizuhara understood what he meant and she stayed with him that night.

* * *


	2. MIZUHARA AND ACKERMAN

* * *

_**FRAGMENTS OF MEMORIES CAME TO HER MIND.**_

Rena Mizuhara hears the talks of the elders about her as if they know something about that she doesn't know, her eyes look at the elders and even to her parents with such stoic and dull reaction. The young Mizuhara couldn't understand what they are talking about but whenever they mention her name, she gets the cold feeling in her. Her aunt takes her away from that scene and the woman's reminder of not listening to the talks of the elder people is something that Rena Mizuhara remembered.

Rena Mizuhara excludes herself from anything related to her name or even to her whole identity as well.

She didn't feel the pain or perhaps she decides not to feel anything at all, Rena flinched a bit when her ring finger was chopped off. Biting her lower lip so hard that it began to bleed, tasting the warm and bitter aftermath of her blood coming from her lower lip. Rena Mizuhara was then called brave but not enough to be considered to be their heir, that is according to the elders' talks. She didn't have the interest to listen to their talks for she excludes herself the moment they mentioned her name.

"Rena Mizuhara needs to suffer more," one of them spoke, earning a death glare from the young Mizuhara that sends goosebumps to the elders. They know that look and it has been centuries since they saw that glare, even Rena Mizuhara couldn't believe it.

Rena Mizuhara was then included in their talks— but she chose not to include herself, she got used to that.

Her thoughts were snapped back to the reality alerting her senses as if she is on danger or somewhat. "Don't even try to think about it," Levi Ackerman spoke— his voice is stoic and serious as ever, Rena only stared at him with her stoic look on her face as if it is not so surprising for her to hear it from Levi Ackerman. Everything clicks on her mind now and it took so long for her to get everything in pieces— she felt anger, rage, betrayed, etc. Her mind wants her to do one thing and only one thing— to kill Levi Ackerman.

"You lied _Levi Ackerman_ ," she growled earning wide eyes from the stoic man, fingers twitching in the knife he is holding but his face remains stoic, trying to calm himself and cool down for a moment.

"I never did but you _did_ so tell me—" Levi said as he approaches her, kneeling on one knee. Rena is too quick as she takes the small knife from his hand and points it to his throat with a swift. "Who really are you, _Rena Mizuhara_?"

"Tell me yours first, I'll tell you mine," she said dryly, her eyes glanced at the knife at pointed at his throat then to his eyes.

"You don't have the right to make rules in this house, brat," Levi said sternly, holding her hand and presses the tip of the knife to his throat.

Rena Mizuhara yelps in surprise as she tries to get out of his grip but it was no use, taking deep breaths she relaxes herself from his grip. She knew that bold move from Levi Ackerman and it means one thing, that is trouble. "Tell me _Rena Mizuhara_ , who are you?" Levi asks again as he presses the knife to his throat, earning a shriek from the girl— if Rena Mizuhara is aggressive then Levi Ackerman is much more aggressive than she thinks. He gently lets go of his grip and takes the knife from her hand, Rena just stares at him.

It is true that Levi Ackerman is the top of the domain chain in the Underground.

"I don't know what to say," Rena Mizuhara said bluntly, her eyes looking down in embarrassment. "All I know is I'm part of a clan."

"You're living in a delusional dream," Levi said sternly.

"I fucking swear! I don't even know why they had to chop my finger when I was a kid," Rena hissed, raising her left hand to show her missing ring finger.

"Tsk you're a brat— everyone's eyes are on you now and you know why," Levi rolls his eyes.

Of course, she thought. Everyone is going to assume it was her who murdered her aunt after that bloody murder she created and with the stain of blood covering her hands there is no doubt that Rena Mizuhara is their prime suspect.

Levi was right— she's plainly nothing but a brat, living in a delusional dream about going outside and wanting to touch the sky. Is it really a delusional lie afterall? Within those fragments of memories that are beginning to bother her, Rena is starting to question herself. Who really is Rena Mizuhara?

"I believe you... but not quite."

That is very Levi Ackerman of him, she told herself. The door bursts open revealing Farlan and Isabel catching their breaths as if they ran all the way home, they both closed the door behind them and goes to Levi. Rena couldn't hear their talks but she knows it has to do with her for sure because the moment Levi looks at her, there was assurance and comfort in his eyes unlike before.

In the back of her mind, she knows her aunt and Levi talked about something way back then that may have sparkled him to do something or perhaps follow whatever the hell her aunt told him but not her.

Rena Mizuhara wants to get out of here as soon as possible.

"Oi are you listening?"

Levi's serious tone snaps her out of it causing her to yelp a bit, her eyes look at the three with daze, confusion and anger. "You're going to do a house cleaning every morning and night, I'll teach you to use the gear the moment you know how to clean," Levi instructed— no, it sounded more like a command to follow.

That she has to agreed upon to do so, a contract to say the least. Isabel and Farlan look at him with fear as if they don't agree with his decision "I don't take orders from a criminal," Rena snapped, silence takes over after her words.

Levi Ackerman takes a deep sigh before turning around to face her, "You murdered those people so that makes you a criminal. Welcome to hell, brat."

Rena is beginning to love and hate the tasks she was given to do around the house but she has no choice but to get moving, if this what pleases him then so be it. She's desperate to ask him a lot of things especially whatever the hell he and her aunt had talked behind her back— speaking of her aunt, she got to see her again at the small funeral but secretly.

Her eyes gazed at her left hand specifically in her missing ring finger back then, Rena didn't care less about her purpose and honor for her family perhaps this is why she didn't feel pain or remorse emotions. What happened back then were all destroyed in her mind and was set to believe that the Underground is a safe haven for her safety.

What do they even mean by stating she's the last descendant? Was there a secret within the family? Out of all people why they chose her?

"Hurry up we better get going," Levi spoke and she immediately turns around to face him, she only nods her head and fastens up cleaning the kitchen. She's amazed at how Levi, Farlan and Isabel hid her well from the public but she couldn't care less. Rena is more worried as to where they are going now, Levi didn't tell her the place.

"Oi keep eyes on me," he spoke sternly causing her to yelp in surprise, feeling his gentle yet tight grip on her right wrist, his thumb caressing her palm.

"Okay Levi," she only managed to say and with that, she didn't left his eyes off Levi Ackerman.

* * *

_**RENA MIZUHARA IS GOOD AT USING THE 3D MANUEVER GEAR.** _

It was an easy piece of cake to say the least— rather in Rena's perspective. She doesn't even know how she can balanced herself in the gear despite trying it just now which leaves an impression to Levi, just who the hell is Rena Mizuhara in the first place?

There is a part of him— and there will be always, that there is a mystery behind Rena Mizuhara that leads her to somewhere and that is what he wants to know all about but the only problem is, Rena herself doesn't even know what the hell is happening. Perhaps the death of her aunt took her to the reality and those fragments of memories began to haunt her like a nightmare now.

Levi can't blame her for it but then again, the question lingers in her mind— who really is Rena Mizuhara at all? Levi doesn't feel awkward towards her but there is tension going around them and he knows it too well, even Rena for sure but he couldn't care less.

"I always wanted to touch the sky," she said not too loud but Levi heard it too well.

It's that damn delusional dream again, he thought but at this point there is now a doubt whether it is a dream or whatnot. Levi Ackerman looks at her now with more questions and doubts about her and that— is it even a dream to be called after all?

"Here touch the sky, Levi," she said again, taking his hand with her and reaches the sky.

Levi Ackerman felt warmth and comfort as his skin touches the ray of the sun, her grip is tight yet so gentle that he thinks she isn't even touching his skin. His eyes focused on Rena Mizuhara not even listening to what she is telling but what's the point? He doesn't care less. "Maybe it isn't delusion after all," he said in a whisper but luckily to Rena, she had heard it and this made her smile a bit— the first time she ever had a genuine smile.

The more she practiced using the gear the more she gets better at it— almost calling her professional by the way she uses the gear smoothly and the way she balances herself in the air, Levi was impressed and so was she but the tension hasn't left them still.

Rena Mizuhara wanted nothing but to touch the sky and she is coming to get at all cost, today is the day— she's going to touch the sky for the first time. The four of them are at the top of an abandoned building with the 3D Maneuver gear on their waists, she knows the plan already and the way Levi gives her the look— Rena is going to touch to the sky.

"I don't have to show my face around people right?" she asks Levi in assurance returning back the look at him "Farlan and Isabel will look behind you, I'll take care of the rest," Levi said confidently— that is one thing she noticed about him, the sheer confidence. There is no day that he wasn't confident enough to tell them something whether it is a small talk or planning out their schemes, as if he is a born leader— aspiring leader in fact.

"Okay," Rena answered, nodding her head in agreement.

"You're a _Mizuhara_ after all," Levi adds, emphasizing her surname.

"And you're an _Ackerman_ ," she said but the last word became a whisper that only Levi could hear it.

She covers half of her face with a scarf, pressing the triggers that connects the wires to the gear. "Don't die... _yet_ ," says Levi as if he reminded her of what to do before going on the mission, Rena glanced briefly at him before quickly jumping off the building and swiftly flew in the air using the 3D Maneuver gear within just a blink of an eye. Isabel and Farlan can't even locate where she is.

Rena Mizuhara acts and moves swiftly with much more speed and reflexes— something that Levi Ackerman wants to have it too.

"She's too good for this," Farlan spoke to him.

"Yet she chose to be one of it," Levi retorts.

"What do you mean by she's a _Mizuhara_ after all, is she a part of a gang or something?" Isabel asks in curiosity, earning a look from Levi.

"She's from a family of assassins and she's their last descendant," Levi answered with no hesitation and no holding back.

**Author's Note:**

> hi hello! yes, i republished this fic because i was not satisfied with how i started it with and it gave me headache at some point but i have improvements and much better ideas for this fic! there are some things i wanna point out or say the least;
> 
> — the characterization of rena mizuhara is based and inspired from assassin's creed so if you see some assassin's creed reference please look away.  
> — as mentioned above, the mizuhara clan is a family of assassins and they served to fight against the titans long ago along with ackermans hence why levi and rena didn't feel like they are strangers though there is awkward tension between them.  
> — this fic will start from no regrets OVA up to season two?? then perhaps a sequel that goes from season three to four?? i haven't thought about it but we will see.  
> — like the ackermans, the remaining members of the mizuhara clan ( rena and her aunt ) hid in the underground for a reason which will be revealed later on.  
> — this is going to be a slow burn relationship due to mostly the first part is oc-centric.  
> — will she join the survey corps? we'll see, maybe she did maybe she didn't.  
> — rena and hange are going to be friends! i don't want to see hange as somehow the "third wheel" between levi and rena plus i love to see levihan broskie moments. also i don't want my oc to have jealousy to hange just because she and levi are close friends.
> 
> that's just the notes for now, i hope you enjoy this! i have so much plans for this fic and i'm excited to write them all!!
> 
> feedbacks, kudos and comments are well appreciated!!


End file.
